Killer: Broke-Ass Loves This

I Knocked My Head Against the Wall

By Anna Swir

As a child
I put my finger in the fire
to become
a saint.

 

As a teenager
every day I would knock my head against the wall.

 

As a young girl
I went out through a window of a garret
to the roof
in order to jump.

 

As a woman
I had lice all over my body.
They cracked when I was ironing my sweater.

 

I waited sixty minutes
to be executed.
I was hungry for six years.

 

Then I bore a child,
they were carving me
without putting me to sleep.

 

Then a thunderbolt killed me
three times and I had to rise from the dead three times
without anyone’s help.

 

Now I am resting
after three resurrections.
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About brokeassgrouch

I'm goddamned broke and grouchy. I live in the middle of the damned ghetto and raise chickens for eggs; grow all my own vegetables and fruit; bake the bread and make the cleaning products. Why? Because I fucking have to, that's why! That's what you do when you're fucking poor! You have to make the shit yourself, dumb-ass! Broke-Ass Grouch is sick of all you Bennington and RISD trustafarians yapping about your "urban farming co-ops" and your "carbon conscious lifestyle" and your "green choices" in the Times Styles section and every alternapress periodical that you can pick up for free in every eye-wateringly expensive, edgy bakery or green-market. Maybe when you have a trust fund, you can make "choices" or have a "lifestyle" or "decide" how to "spend" your "money." Excuse me, but Mama is just trying to feed her kids over here, you little shits. And stop spraying your art-school graffiti on the fence of the vacant lot across the street from my house. I know who you are, and I'm telling my friend Keith (who lives in the projects) that it was you who painted that cartoon of the African mask. So what can I tell you? I don't fucking know. I know a lot about being broke, sure as Bob's your fucking uncle. I know about how useless an Ivy League degree is when you're flat-ass broke. I know how to unclog a drain with baking soda and vinegar, and I know how to make my own CHEESE, for fuck's sake. You tell me.
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